


for i will be horribly in love with her

by nowrunalong



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: F/F, Genderbending, Timeline What Timeline
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-28
Updated: 2017-04-30
Packaged: 2018-10-25 02:05:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,746
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10754481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nowrunalong/pseuds/nowrunalong
Summary: “You know,” Giles says, from the top of the stairs, “an online archive could never possibly compare to the expanse of a… areallibrary.”“What, are you kidding? Do you know how much data you can fit in an archive? Do you have Hyperion’s Guide to Demonic Oddities in your ‘real’ library?”Loosely based on the events of Much Ado About Nothing. Familiarity with the play not required!





	1. act i

**Author's Note:**

  * For [The_Eclectic_Bookworm](https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Eclectic_Bookworm/gifts).



> femslash Calendiles!

“Is the librarian here?” Jenny asks at the door, interrupting Buffy and Willow’s game of Anywhere But Here. “Roberta Giles?”

“Hey, Ms. Calendar. Giles went out,” Buffy says, spinning a pencil around between her fingers. “Left an amul—um, an animal.” She stops her spinning, eyes wide. “At her house. Which she… went to get.”

“What kind of animal would she need at a library?”

“Oh, she didn’t go to _get_ it,” Willow says quickly. “She went to, uh. _Feed_ it. You know how it is when they’re new. Can’t leave ‘em alone for more than a few hours.” She smiles apologetically. “She’ll be back soon, though.”

“What did you need her for? Is she in trouble?” Buffy asks hopefully.

Jenny laughs. “No. Well—not yet, at least. I just need a book. I heard she was the one to go to.”

“Oh, she is!” Willow says. “She’s great with—with the books. Um, which you knew. Seeing as she’s a librarian.” She looks down at the book she has open on the table, awkward.

Before Jenny can answer, the library door busts open and Faith strides in, Giles trailing behind her.

“Look who I found!” Faith announces, dropping down in a chair across from Buffy and Willow. “Didn’t know they let her leave this place.” She looks up at Jenny with a frown. “Who’re you?”

“This is Ms. Calendar, the new computer teacher,” Willow says.

“Ah. Computers.” Giles comes to a halt next to Jenny. “I prefer to acquire my knowledge from a good book, myself.”

“I suspected as much,” Jenny says, with a little smirk. “I’m looking for a text on ancient runic seals.”

“I-I’m sorry?” Giles asks. She looks stunned.

Buffy, Willow, and Faith turn to watch the exchange with interest.

“Ancient runic seals. Heard you were the gal to talk to.”

“Heard from _whom_ , may I ask?”

“Some guy in a shop,” Jenny shrugs. “It’s not important. What is important is that it’s missing from my online archive.”

“Online archive? Who archives texts about—?”

“Ancient runic seals, Roberta,” Jenny repeats, raising an eyebrow. “Or do you need me to say it a fourth time?”

“Sorry,” Giles says, flustered. She takes off her glasses and begins to clean them. “It’s just that I don’t recall—I-I mean, we don’t have any such books in the… the official library catalogue. I’m not sure how…”

“Look, do you have the damn book or not? I’ve got a class starting in fifteen minutes.”

“Right, y-yes, of course.”

Still frowning, Giles replaces the glasses on her nose and wanders off into the stacks.

Jenny winks at Willow and waits, hand on hip, for Giles to come back.

“You know,” Giles says, from the top of the stairs, “an online archive could never possibly compare to the expanse of a… a _real_ library.”

“What, are you kidding? Do you know how much data you can fit in an archive? Do you have Hyperion’s Guide to Demonic Oddities in your ‘real’ library?”

“Well… not as such, but—”

“The Expanded History of the Wrath of Calypso?”

“Um, no, but—”

“The first, _unedited_ edition of Amara’s diaries?”

“No, but—”

“The archive’s got all of those, and thousands of others. More than you could ever fit in a _high school_ library.”

“This is one of the most complete collections in North America,” Giles says defensively.

“And I’m sure it was impressive—ten years ago. This is the 2000s, Roberta. Get with the times!”

“The _times_ , as you say, evidently still need my library. Seeing as you’ve come here for a book you _don’t_ have access to.” Giles clutches the aforementioned book to her chest like she’s considering not handing it over.

“You want me to list everything your library’s missing? ‘Cause we’d be here all night. Book?”

Giles holds the book out reluctantly and Jenny snatches it up. “Thank you.”

“Wait—Ms. Calendar. May I ask what exactly it is that you’re researching? Because I think you’ll find that I—”

“Know a lot about the subject? I’m sure you do. But I think I can manage.” Jenny grins enigmatically before turning to Buffy and Willow. “See you girls later, all right? And you,” she says to Faith, “how come I’ve never seen you in my classes?”

“Doin’ P.E. instead,” Faith says. “I’ll take getting sweaty over starin’ at a screen any day. Sorry, Ms. C.”

“Well, I’d say you’re missing out, but you probably wouldn’t believe me.” She smiles again and gives the teens a little wave before exiting the library.

“I liked her,” Faith says, after Jenny leaves. She looks over to where Giles is still standing, slightly frozen, at the bottom of the staircase. “I mean—damn, G! She really _tore_ you apart.”

“Yes,” Giles says stiffly. She removes her glasses and begins to polish them again.

“It’s getting late,” Buffy announces, standing up. “I better get with the patrolling. Will, you coming?”

“Not tonight,” Willow says. “I wanna finish up here. I’ve got all my homework open.”

“I’ll come,” Giles says. “The prospect of shoving wooden stakes through the evil undead sounds rather appealing right now. We can discuss Trask's amulet tomorrow.”

“Ms. Calendar really did a number on you, huh? Don’t worry: we still love you, even if you _do_ have a deficient library.”

“It is _not_ —”

“Hey, I’m just getting you going,” Buffy grins. “Faith? You coming?”

“You go. I’ll catch you up.”

Buffy shrugs. “Kay. We’re going to Restfield first.”

Faith watches as the doors swing shut behind Buffy and Giles, then spins lightning-fast to face Willow.

Willow looks back at her nervously. “Uh. Did you need help with your homework? Cause I—”

“You think I don’t know what’s going on with you, Red?”

“Wh-what?” Willow frowns. “I don’t know what you—”

“With B.”

“What about B? Uh, Buffy, I mean.”

“Prom coming up. All the girls and boys lookin’ for someone to spend that perfect night with. Anything ringin’ bells?”

“Prom, sure. But what do you—”

“God, just ask her already! What’s the worst that could happen? It’s nauseating, watching you moon over her whenever she walks into the room.”

“I don’t _moon_ —”

“Kinda do,” Faith says. “And if you don’t want me to tell her, you’re gonna do something about it.”

“What?” Willow asks, shrinking in her seat. “What if she says no? What if she hates me and never, ever wants to look at me again? These kinds of feelings can ruin a perfectly perfect best-friendship!”

“Is a ‘best-friendship’ what you want?”

“When did you get all insightful?” Willow asks suspiciously.

“Don’t need insight when you’re being so damn obvious.”

“Faith, I can’t.”

Faith sighs. “I’m going to regret this.”

“Regret what?”

“Helping you get the girl. It’s easy. You got a pen and paper, right? Ready to write this down? Okay. ‘B. I’ve had the hots for you for a while. Wanna go to that lame ass overpriced dance together?’”

Willow stares helplessly.

—

Spike’s strolling down the hall toward the library with some news for Buffy when he hears voices on the other side of the door.

_“—B. I’ve had the hots for you for a while. Wanna go to that lame ass overpriced dance together?”_

_“That’s awful,” Willow’s saying. “You actually think she’d react well to that? ‘Cause I don’t.”_

_“I’m not hearing any better ideas.”_

One Slayer asking out the other? This is news. He smirks.

_“I don’t know. Can’t I just say, ‘hey, you don’t have a date. I don’t have a date. Let’s go together. But not as… as a date, because—”_

_“But you want it to be a date, Red.”_

_“Oh. Yeah.”_

So it’s _Red_ who has the hots for the Slayer. Spike can’t say he’s surprised. He half wants to stick his head in to interrupt the conversation, but resists the temptation. If this is the hot topic tonight, then evidently Buffy isn’t here.

He continues on his way with mischief in his un-beating heart.


	2. act ii

“Mind if I have this dance?” Faith asks, while bodily cutting in between Buffy and Xander.

“Oh, no, of course,” Xander says from behind her. He sounds very much like he does mind, but Faith just smirks and places her hands on Buffy’s waist. After an awkward moment, Xander frowns and retreats.

“Hey, B.”

“Hey,” Buffy says, surprised. “Didn’t know you liked the slow dances.”

“They’re good for talkin’. Not so much for dancing.”

“You want to talk? On a dance floor?”

Still, Buffy puts her arms around Faith’s shoulders and begins to sway in time with the music.

“I got a proposition for you, B.”

Buffy’s eyes go wide.

“See,” Faith continues, “I know someone else who wants to dance with you—probably in the other sense, too,” she adds pensively, “you know: do the horizontal tango.”

“Um,” Buffy says.

“Anyway, this person. Kind of a cowardly sort when it comes to the art of seduction. So I’m askin’ in her place.”

“Her?”

“Don’t play the blind man, B. You can’t miss the way she looks at you.”

“Who what?”

“Red.”

“ _Willow_ likes me? I thought she liked—”

“Xander? Babe, she got over him months ago.”

“Oh.” Buffy looks blankly back at Faith. “Huh?”

“Buffy. You’ve already turned down four guys. If you’re holdin’ out for someone special…” Faith trails off suggestively.

“What?” Buffy says. “ _You?_ ”

“God, B, I just told you that Willow’s the one with a big damn crush on you. Are you gettin’ this yet? She wants to take you to the prom.”

“Really?”

Faith sighs exasperatedly.

“Sorry, it’s just—I-I didn’t know. And now… I know, and, and—” Buffy eyes widen again. “I have to talk to Willow.”

She makes to turn away, but Faith catches her arm. “Hang on, B. What are you gonna tell her?”

—

Willow sits at the Scooby table with Xander, watching Buffy and Faith sway on the dancefloor. 

“Heard the rumours?” a voice asks from behind them. Willow jumps and spins in her chair to face…

Spike. 

“Oh,” she says, relaxing slightly. “Your voice for sounded for a moment like you might be someone scary.”

“I _am_ scary,” Spike says, offended.

“Yeah, and I’m the Prince of Egypt,” Xander says. “Rumours about what?”

“Faith. Got the hots for your Buffy. She’s gonna ask her to that dance you all keep yammering about.”

“What?” Willow asks, frowning. “No, she’s not.”

“They do look pretty cozy over there,” Xander says, unable to hide a trace of resentment.

“She’s not!” Willow insists. “She wouldn’t! Would she?” She looks to Xander for reassurance.

“Sure she would,” Xander says, shrugging. “And—I know why _I_ care. But why do you?”

“I… I don’t,” Willow says, covering badly.

“Willow!” Buffy calls then. She’s pushing her way through the crowd, away from Faith and towards their table.

Willow looks alarmed. “Oh God, she’s coming over.”

Spike smirks. “Got some news for you, I suspect.”

“Willow!” Buffy calls again. She reaches the table, stopping in front of Willow and placing her hands on her shoulders. “Will. Wanna go to prom with me?”

“But—Faith?”

“What about Faith?”

“I thought she was gonna ask you.”

“To prom?” Buffy laughs. “No. But she told me that you…” She frowns, suddenly worried. “You do, don’t you? This isn’t some big Faith joke, is it? ‘Cause then I’d have to kill her.”

“No, it-it’s true. I do. Uh, want to. Go. With you.”

Buffy grins widely. “Wanna celebrate with a dance?”

“I thought you were dancing with Faith?”

“Faith’s found some new friends already,” Buffy says, unworried. She removes her hands from Willow’s shoulders and takes her hands, pulling her up out of her chair. “Right now I wanna dance with my date.”

—

“Would you look at these two,” Faith says, looking at Buffy and Willow holding hands under the table with a smirk. “Way too easy.”

“Easy?” Willow says, gaping. “More like, ‘I’m shaking in my boots in terror at the possibility of rejection and a ruined friendship.’”

“B said yes, though, didn’t she? Listen. I got a better idea.”

“A better idea than what?” Buffy asks, tightening her grip on Willow’s hand.

“A better _challenge_. A bigger one. G and Ms. Calendar.”

“What about them?”

“We set them up,” Faith says, like it’s obvious. 

“What? We who?” Buffy asks.

“Us. Come on, we’d be doin’ both of ‘em a favour. I bet G hasn’t been on a date in years, and Ms. C drives her mad.”

“Isn’t that a reason _not_ to put them in a room together?”

“No way. It’s a great idea. Who’s with me?”

—

Giles is in her office, drinking tea and reading a very old about ancient runic seals. Nothing to do with Jenny. She’d just been in the mood. Suddenly, runes were particularly interesting.

It wasn’t like she wanted to be _more_ of an expert than the other teacher. That would be petty, and Giles was anything but. Evidently.

She hears the shuffle of teenagers entering the library and sits down her tea, prepared to leave her office, when she stops in her tracks.

“You haven’t heard?” Buffy is saying. “Ms. Calendar thinks that Giles is a hottie. Which—I mean, colour me confused, ‘cause Giles is totally old. But it’s true.”

_What?_

Giles presses her ear to the door, positive she’d just misheard. 

“I heard!” Willow chimes in. “And I heard that Ms. Calendar doesn’t wanna tell Giles anything, ‘cause she’s afraid she’ll make fun of her. ‘Cause—she would, right?”

“Probably. I bet she’s still holding a grudge for everything Ms. C said about her library.”

“She’d be crazy to turn her down, though,” Willow says sadly. “Ms. Calendar is my favourite teacher. She’s so smart, and she’s funny, and once—Buffy, remember that time when she let me be the teacher for a little bit?”

“Yeah! You were great.”

“It was really fun. No other teacher would’ve trusted me like that. I’m really glad she transferred here.”

“Shame G doesn’t seem to think so.”

“D’you think—should we tell her? Like Faith told Buffy about me? Make it easier for Ms. Calendar?”

“No way,” Faith says. “I only did that ‘cause I was sure Buffy’d say yes.”

“Yeah, I guess. Who knows how Giles would react.”

“She’d probably start by cleaning her glasses,” Buffy suggests. “Come on, let’s go. I don’t think Giles is here.”

There’s the sound of feet shuffling toward the door, and then they’re gone again.

Giles stands up straight and, alone her office, blinks incredulously.

“ _What?_ ”

—

Jenny returns later with the book.

“Hello?” she calls. “Roberta? Oh, hey,” she adds, as Giles emerges from her office. “Brought your mouldy old book back.”

“Thank you,” Giles says, surprised. “That was quick.”

“Figured you might be losing sleep without it.”

Jenny has a coffee in one hand, and the book tucked under her opposite arm. Giles eyes the coffee warily.

“You know, coffee and my ‘mouldy old books’ don’t really mix very well.”

“Relax, Roberta. I clean up anything that spills.”

“That spills?” splutters Giles. “You—?”

Jenny hands the book over with a smirk, and Giles flips through it anxiously, looking for stains.

“Oh, it’s fine. The book’s good as new. Or, good as very-old. I just love to see you squirm.”

“Oh, thank God.” Giles look up, ready to berate Jenny for causing her grief, when she sort of… notices.

Jenny is beautiful.

Of course, she hadn’t exactly been _oblivious_ to this before, but here she is now, radiant as she stands in the middle of the library. With Giles. Whom she _supposedly_ —no. It can’t be true.

Can it?

“Did you find what you needed?”

“In that book? Please. I didn’t read it. What would I need with a text about runic seals? I scanned it to add to the archive. An online colleague in Brazil needed to decipher something she found in a cavern.”

“Oh.”

“Are you _really_ an expert?” Jenny asks.

“Not as such,” Giles admits. “Or, at least—I wasn’t yesterday.”

She mumbles something about “would have picked something different to read today” under her breath, and Jenny laughs.

“Anyone ever tell you you’re kind of a fuddy-duddy?”

“Oh, thanks ever so.”

Jenny grins. “I’ve gotta run. See you around, Roberta.”

“Yes, hopefully,” Giles says, without thinking.

Jenny raises a questioning eyebrow ( _‘hopefully? I can knock you down with four words_ ,’ Giles thinks it says), but leaves the library without any further comments.

“Damn,” Giles says to no one. And then: “Maybe she likes me?”


End file.
